Book Titles

When you’re at an impasse – when what a giver suggests is difficult for you or even unacceptable – ask about the underlying interests behind the suggestion.

To solve the real problem, you have to understand the real interests… you have to dig behind the stated positions and identify which bucket the interests fall into.

Remember: Feedback conversations are rarely one-shot deals. They are usually a series of conversations over time…

…the ability to learn from feedback is what will shape your future most.

…the attention and effort that goes into resisting temptation (or forcing new, less-appealing behavior) leaves less energy, attention, and persistence available to complete other tasks. – Roy Baumeister

Our capacity to attend to change is a limited resource. Hence, less is more (more or less).

In any contest between change and the status quo, the status quo has home field advantage. All things being equal, we won’t change.

When things are going well, feedback can feel threatening, …because it is asking us to let go of something that’s comfortable and predictable.

…there are significant life rewards for being willing to test out feedback even when you’re not sure it’s right, or even pretty sure it’s wrong.

…sometimes we know exactly what the right, smart, effective, healthy thing is, and we still don’t do it.