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Self-control without goals and other standards would be nothing more than aimless change, like trying to diet without any idea of which foods are fattening.

Once you’ve taken the first two steps in self-control – setting a goal and monitoring your behavior – you’re confronted with a personal question: Should you focus on how far you’ve come or how much remains to be done?

…orderly habits… can actually improve self-control in the long run by triggering automatic mental processes that don’t require much energy.

Self-control turns out to be linked to habits, whereas the more controlled sorts of behaviors tend to be unusual or one-time-only actions.

Use your self-control to form a daily habit, and you’ll produce more with less effort in the long run.

…self-control is not selfish. Willpower enables us to get along with others and override impulses that are based on personal short-term interests.

…a narrow, concrete, here-and-now focus works against self-control, whereas a broad, abstract, long-term focus supports it.

…your belief becomes a form of self-control: a self-fulfilling mandate. I think I won’t, therefore I don’t.

Forget about self-esteem. Work on self-control.

The problem with adolescents – from the parents’ point of view – is that they have a child’s power of self-control presiding over an adult’s wants and urges.