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Throughout human history, shared pain has been a bonding agent, fusing identities into ‘we’-based attachments.
|
409 |
 |
Pain. This is what brings every adversary in every negotiation to the table.
|
159 |
 |
People make decisions in order to alleviate and take away this current or future problem – this pain.
|
160 |
 |
As a negotiator you can and will make a lot of mistakes, of course, but your clear vision of your adversary’s pain will see you through thick and thin.
|
162 |
 |
In the political and moral realm, you could almost define leadership as the effective painting of the pain shared by leader and people.
|
164 |
 |
…you must never enter a negotiation in which you haven’t seen your adversary’s pain. Never.
|
165 |
 |
People – negotiators – have to feel safe in order to reveal their pain and, perhaps, even to see it clearly themselves.
|
166 |
 |
Paint the pain. When you finally get to the right person in a negotiation, they will often spill the beans and reveal their real pain so that you can fix it.
|
168 |
 |
…a fractured team is just like a broken arm or leg; fixing it is always painful, and sometimes you have to rebreak it to make it heal correctly. And the rebreak hurts a lot more than the initial break, because you have to do it on purpose.
|
37 |
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Being wrong won’t always be joyful. The path to embracing mistakes is full of painful moments, and we handle those moments better when we remember they’re essential for progress.
|
72 |
